Stronzo, you sure start some thought-provoking topics, and this one is no exception. I'm glad a few people made mention of me, because your threads get read, and I have an opportunity to explain my viewpoint here.
Manners are great. They got me far in the corporate world, and they help me to reach people in real life that wouldn't give me the time of day otherwise. When used properly, they can open doors and say nice things about you to the people you meet, all good things.
But this is the internet, and this is our playground, for lack of a better paradigm. We come here for a variety of different reasons, but mine is to learn. I am absolutely fascinated by human behavior and spend absurd amounts of time constructing personality profiles of people based on the words they type, so this is all very interesting to me. I have learned tremendous amouts of things here from people very different from myself, and that experience has been invaluable. I find myself very short tempered with those unwilling or unable to learn, or who have come here for ego-gratification.
Dong20 said that manners are not always veiled hatred, and to that I wholeheartedly agree. Anytime we use words like "Always", we can pretty well expect to be wrong. I'd say manners are usually sincere, and an expression of the speaker's sense of personal dignity. This is something I respect and hold in high regard. Actually, any time a person is upholding their own morality, I am impressed.
The problem is the few who use it otherwise. These people are rarely aware of the limits of their own behavior, and are not "scheming"- they're just not able to see beyond the scope of what they hold to be true, to consider another way. "Veiled racists"? Oh hell yeah, and misgoynists, and xenophobes of all kinds. You're not going to make any real progress with someone like that, because they have not come here to learn, they have come to instruct.
Someone mentioned ChimeraTX, the racist kid from Texas. He annoyed the shit out of me with his "I don't curse so therefore I'm polite" bullshit, but we were able to make friends and had a mutual respect of sorts, even though we had each other on ignore half the time, haha. I miss him and I wonder often how he's doing. He was brilliant, and I'd always hoped that exposure to such a wide range of people here would be good for him. Truly, I think it was and I miss our teens here sorely.
I am direct, and I appreciate directness. I also follow the golden rule, although very few people understand that. They think the golden rule means to "be nice like me", but it does not. It means to treat others the way you'd want to be treated, and that I do.
) do you suggest the latter-mentioned poster is pure "Mr. Hyde"?
