Is it true that most gays don't really accept bisexuals?

[Smaccoms]

I don't really understand. People can accept heterosexuality and homosexuality, so why not both of them together? I mean, thats what bisexual is. I hate how ppl say they are accepting, when they're NOT..., this is kinda one of those situations...

 

[D_Biff Wellington]

I don't really understand. People can accept heterosexuality and homosexuality, so why not both of them together? I mean, thats what bisexual is. I hate how ppl say they are accepting, when they're NOT..., this is kinda one of those situations...

I feel that a lot of older homosexuals probably won't accept bisexuality as an option given the historical persecution that they've gone through. If you look at what a lot of older dudes had to do in order to simply carry a job (get married, have a wife, sneak around while in the closet), it probably appears to them that bi kids are just in denial because a lot of our practices are similar to those of closeted homosexuals of another generation which they all fought damn hard to liberate.

 

[Quadee]

How would this be any different than a Straight Man wanting to cheat on his wife with another woman or a Gay Man wanting to cheat on his man with another man.

I don't think because the options of having sex with either sex means that if someone is locked into a relationship that they are more likely to cheat on that person.

That is way unfair for you to compare because you cannot. A GAY man has the more of a choice to go and cheat with another man, but a BISEXUAL man really does not. I wouldn't be giving the BI man all that he need nor desire because it is impossible for me to do that, but a GAY man I am giving him what he desires but he wants to be selfish or whatever and fuck around on me. Same with a Straight man. Don't go comparing things that are impossible to compare.

 

[Quadee]

Buddy, generalisations stink. Gay, straight or bi - there are jerks. Period. However not all gay, straight or bisexual people behave in the same manner.

I am deeply aware of my wife's feelings and they are always considered. Regardless of how painful/scary/vulnerable things may be, I ALWAYS strive to be completely honest and upfront with my wife so that she knows what's going on inside of me so that this knowledge is enables her to make informed decisions about what's in her best interests. I've gone so far as to offer her divorce (before having any kind of relationship with a man) in order to try to protect her from pain and destruction.

There may be some who think that it's a free for all but not all of us conduct ourselves in this manner. It pains me deeply that she has a bisexual husband because I can't help but feel as if she's gotten a raw deal (though she tries to reassure me that this isn't the case). God alone knows how I wish that I knew that I was bi before I had gotten married so that she would have been able to have decided if she wanted to marry me in light of what this reality puts before her - it is deeply regrettable on my part. Truth be told (and I've told her this as well), if I had known that I was bi, much as I love her (and did at the time) I don't think that I would have married her. It just seems to be so unfair to me. The ideal for me would be for to bisexual people to enter into a committed relationship together.

I have however given myself permission (so has she) to allow myself to be bi because that is who I am. It is not for the sake of sex, thrills or lust but to be able to live out my truth without trying to suppress parts of myself or my desires. I reached this point in my life because I realised that I cannot live out a fractured existence and by trying to suppress things, I actually stood to make things worse ie it would have a negative impact on my wife and marriage. I also realised that I had no right to demand or even request this of my wife hence my suggestion that we have a serious look at getting divorced.

To be fair to you, you realized after you were married that you were bi, so I really can't point fingers. To be fair for me, you know what your wife is or may be going through, so you should understand that I don't want to go though that nor deal with it at all.

 

[losangelestim]

we accept them if they have big dicks

 

[ZOS23xy]

This has been my experience. Didn't mean to shake anyone up. To the comment that there were those I met that said "you can't be bi sexual; you have to be one way or the other."


PRIMAL SAVAGE sez: That's a crock!!! See my post right above yours. Tho you may not think so, this is the only type of verbally abusive comments I've previously encountered from guys that claim they're 100% gay.


Meaning, ultimately, there are those is the communities who only see black and white. And within the tight community I am in, there are gay men who want to have absolutely NOTHING to do with women. I mean, no talking....

 

[B_Italian1]

we accept them if they have big dicks

shallow

 

[vindicator]

My best friend who is bi says the same thing... that bi's are looked down on by not only gays but straights as well because they're not really on either team or they think they want it both ways or are on the fence.

Personally i think thats complete bullshit, but i think labeling ones self is bullshit anyway. I don't look at him any differently. In fact, i think we have more in common cause we both suck cock! People need to look at the similarities that bring them together, not the differences that drive us apart. So what if he likes pussy too! Thats awesome. The more the better!

I think the anti-bi feelings from gays is similar to the way some gays look down upon other gays for not "being out". I'm out, but not completely. I don't find the need for people at work to know because my sexuality is really none of their business. But friends and family know. But i still get shit from some gay friends for not being 100% out.

 

[willow78]

I think there is always some hesitance to anyone who is different from yourself no matter how accepting you think you are. It doesn't necessarily mean you hate them but because they are different to you, you don't share a point of reference, which makes them difficult to relate to. There are straight people who hate gays, but there are also gay people who hate straights. It doesn't just happen with sexuality, it also happens with race and religion, among other things.

P.S. I'm NOT one of the gays who hate straights. I like straight people, I was raised by two of them. :smile:

 

[willow78]

I agree with Vindicator about being out. I'm 29 years old and I haven't told my family because there is nothing to tell. If I had a boyfriend, I would tell them I had a boyfriend but I wouldn't tell them "I'm Gay!" I think it's one-dimensional to define one's-self soley by sexuality or race. Which is why I get annoyed by people who say "I'm proud to be gay" or "I'm proud to be black". I'm not saying they're things to be ashamed of, I'm just saying be proud of yourself as a whole person, not just something superficial like skin colour or sexuality.
I have issues with my own community because of all these gay pride marches. We are constantly telling people that a person's sexuality is irrelevent and should be treated as such and then we parade down a street identifying ourselves by nothing else. Straight people don't have to announce their sexuality so why should we?
I know I've gone off the whole point of this thread but it's something I felt needed to be said.

 

[biguy2738]

To be fair to you, you realized after you were married that you were bi, so I really can't point fingers. To be fair for me, you know what your wife is or may be going through, so you should understand that I don't want to go though that nor deal with it at all.

Quadee, I'm not telling you that you have to go through anything. I am however trying to point out that we all deal with things differently...and that not all bi folk treat their orientation like a free for all.

In all honesty (and much to my surprise) my wife isn't going through very much. She REALLY is alright with everything. She tells me that the only thing that she has to contend with, and it makes her feel insecure is the fact that I've become very grey. Up till the past eight months I was a black and white kind of guy. I knew who I was, where I was going, what I wanted from the future but now it's all diminished into varying shades of grey and it makes her feel a bit insecure.

Please know that I'm not trying to convince you to or not to do anything. You are entitled to decide on what's best for you and what makes you the most happy. I'm only challenging the stereotyping, misconception and discrimination.

The only way to see somebody else's vision of the world is through discussion. I think that the important thing to remember in threads like this is that in the midst of the disagreement, misunderstanding and even anger/frustration/hurt we are talking and with it comes the opportunity to educate.

 

[BigLittleMan]

Personally, i have been not 'accepted' by male gays and straight people.
any lesbian or other bi have been very warm towards me and understanding.

as said before, often people just don't understand and think i am some kind of perv because i like hot guys and hot girls.


but whatever, the best of both worlds :wink:

i think it would help a lot if you give your definition of "accepted." are you being harassed? have you lost a job? has your family disowned you?

 

[rbkwp]

Well i say/DONT worry yourself about it at all matey
ENJOY Life for what you are/just a most Beautiful Person,i am sure.
The many persons who remain Negative thruout there life,are really fools unto themselves i feel,and i am 100% Gay'

 

[rbkwp]

In Case anyone tells me my Profile says 50/50.i WILL admit that i bullshitted on that/just need to get back in and change it.SORRY!!..(dont know why i did/but think it was just a case of being annoyed..re registerin--often just clik on Anything.)
eric

 

[Quadee]

Quadee, I'm not telling you that you have to go through anything. I am however trying to point out that we all deal with things differently...and that not all bi folk treat their orientation like a free for all.

In all honesty (and much to my surprise) my wife isn't going through very much. She REALLY is alright with everything. She tells me that the only thing that she has to contend with, and it makes her feel insecure is the fact that I've become very grey. Up till the past eight months I was a black and white kind of guy. I knew who I was, where I was going, what I wanted from the future but now it's all diminished into varying shades of grey and it makes her feel a bit insecure.

Please know that I'm not trying to convince you to or not to do anything. You are entitled to decide on what's best for you and what makes you the most happy. I'm only challenging the stereotyping, misconception and discrimination.

The only way to see somebody else's vision of the world is through discussion. I think that the important thing to remember in threads like this is that in the midst of the disagreement, misunderstanding and even anger/frustration/hurt we are talking and with it comes the opportunity to educate.

Ok I understand you now.

 

[willow78]

I think it's one-dimensional to define one's-self soley by sexuality or race.

I also think that's meant to be solely.






I'm quoting myself. How lame is that!

 

[2322]

I also think that's meant to be solely.

Just ask the original author to be 100% certain. :wink:

 

[willow78]

Quote:
Originally Posted by willow78

I also think that's meant to be solely.

Just ask the original author to be 100% certain. :wink:

I am the original author.

 

[willow78]

Quote:
Originally Posted by willow78
I also think that's meant to be solely.

Just ask the original author to be 100% certain. :wink:

I am the original author.

 

[willow78]

Sorry that posted twice. I tried to delete the first one but I didn't know how.