Where do you stand with open relationships or cheating?

[halcyondays]

Okay. Back to biology.

Our species doesn't instinctually form lifetime or even long term exclusive pair bonds heterosexual or otherwise. Few animal species do.

If we did we'd all still be pair-bonded for life to the first person with whom we mated and never look at anyone else, fall in love with anyone else, be tempted by anyone else, fantasize anyone else or actually mate with anyone else.

We might not ever look at porn either... or romance stories.

Short term and mid-term pair bonds are all that's required for reproductive success. The shear number of divorces and multi-parent families proves this.

In my experience it is unrealistic to expect humans not to lie, cheat and steal--and that's just in the world of relationships.

 

[jjprodriv]

From my experience with open relationships, I can determine two types: 1) the type that is open to experiment when the right moment happens, then you talk about it and come to an agreement, as the experience might be beneficial for both parts, and 2) the type of relationship where one of the members wants to feel ‘single’ and sleep with others without telling their partner.
I am personally more driven to number 1, and in those cases, ‘cheating’ isn’t a concept anymore, unless one of the members lie or is dishonest with their desires.

 

[Raybo Revoy]

The emotional side of it is one things. The health issues involved can be a problem.

 

[aheidla]

If two people mutually agree to have an open relationship that's their business. If someone cheats, that involves lying and shows a lack of character. In short, cheaters are objectively awful people.

This is one of the multitudes of reasons I stay to myself.

Also because...

 

[Sagittarius84]

I have been cheated on and have cheated. It's very rarely a cut and dry issue of moral objectivity.

 

[bravesoldier]

I've been in an open relationship for about 5 years now. They can be fun and can work as long as there is respect and knowing when to draw a line, no matter what the line may be. They can last for sure, but there is never a guarantee an open relationship will last. Mine is about to end because of the line being crossed. Also, I know the guy I'd be chasing as soon as it ends because he was one of the first guys I met through playing with my BF. I think in a sense I fell for the guy I'd run to the first time I met him.

 

[easytwist]

I don't stand. I lay down.

 

[elklindoxxx]

My partner and I have an open relationship and communication is key. There are times when we go with other couples and there are times when we will individually have "dates" with other people. And it's always communicated, there are no secrets. It's not cheating

 

[Negonoia]

Cheating = not cool

Open relationships = I personally don't do it but have no problem with others doing it

 

[DavidAlmeria]

I’m probably on my own with this but I find cheating incredibly hot. I’d love my partner to cheat more often particularly with someone I know who can tell me all the details. I also don’t think that love and sex are the same thing at all. Particularly as you get older. Just my opinion.

 

[northernirish]

Personally... I do not understand this whole movement of poly relationships and stuff. If I was interested in someone and they mentioned that that's what they want... I'm out.. If I am in a relationship with someone and they suddenly bring up the idea.. I am getting incredibly angry and leaving them. It's just a new way of saying you're a slut and are hooking up with a lot of different people, which is OKAY by the way! But label it as such. It's not a relationship, you just have a lot of FWB.

 

[BottomAtl]

What do you do when a relationship loses the sizzle over time? When the other person becomes less attractive than the person you met years ago? And I'm speaking at the other person!

 

[deleted15329811]

Nope after my 2020 debacle randos aint for me! 1 & done!